Cycling!

So me and my 2 wheels have been reunited again, and I do feel really damn good at the moment. Like my life is tarting to fit in to places that I really have no intentions of going backwards that this is where my life is and I feel HAPPY!

Anyway it has been about 9 months or so till I last set foot on my road bike. I practically cycled most of last summer and I really loved it. it really helped me in so many ways:

• being able to eat on the go (when your cycling you need food at least every 15 minutes to be able to maintain energy) especially on my 3 hour rides!
• eating carbs- they helped me get over my fear of carbs, you need carbs for cycling and I was even able to drink sugary drinks
• eating a lot I mean one day I had to eat 3000 calories for doing a 60 mile ride
• have friendships with something in common other than an illness. 
• eat in front of other-I joined a cycling group they all ate cake but I was able to have a cereal bar with them and feel okay with it.
• maintaining my weight and being at higher weight, I very much nearly reached a bmi of 17. one of the reasons I stopped was because I stopped eating enough to be able to cycle well and that was depressing

However, I stopped because I looked in the mirror and all the old thoughts came back that I am fat that I don't deserve nice things, I was starting college and thought people wold think I was fat, and so the bike went and eating little started again. I also moved back home which wasn't the most wisest move. BUT I did know that I wouldn't have time with my course but now my course is less me and the bike come back:)

however I am taking it slowly, just going out for one hour and building it up slowly and wont be doing it competively like I did before with a cycling group just for pleasure. I cant go out loads as do still have college work to do. But I feel happy that I have started cycling again. I feel that exercise has been so positive for me, does anyone else find exercise helpful? for me its about having the right balance