Great week and a milestone

Sorry for the lack of blogging recently. I have just had a busy week. even my evenings have been busy. It all started on Friday the 13th... Known to many as

A day that means bad news. However my day was pretty awesome. Firstly had the last part of my training for a health care assistant job and afterwards i was able to go to an interview that i didnt think I could go too as my training overlaped. However my training finished earlier so I called the other job up and asked if I could attend the interview. I was unprepared, but I managed to nail the interview. I even had to speak to a group of teenagers about a social action project... However I got the job, and proud and happy I was.

 I never thought it possible that even a few months ago I would be working as a youth worker, let alone attending an interview at the whim.

In other news my injury is loads better and am pretty much back to all my usual activities. Went on a 50 mile cycle ride yesterday and felt so so strong, best I have ever ridden. Although I am sick of people commenting on my small size and asking how much I weigh- no joke!!! I mean you would never ask someone who was obese what their weight was. I find it strange as I am at the highest weight I have been at for nearly 8 years!!!! I myself still feel "big", but to others I am not so maybe it is all in my head . I also decided to weigh myself this morning, and my BMI for the first time in goodness knows how many years is in the healthy range. I didn't feel awful as I thought I would do BUT I felt proud, proud that I have done this on my own.

I never thought it would be possible that I would be able to eat what I am eating, be the weight I am now, be happy, have an amazing boyfriend, have things in common with people that isn't having an eating disorder in common, to have friends that love me for who I am and to be able to converse with them with everyday conversations. I have put on around 10 kg since January time, many of my clothes no longer fit me. Alhough difficult I know its a good thing and I can now get new clothes:p  I may not like my legs, I may still look in the mirror and feel big but they are strong, I can cycle, run, and swim and most importanly I feel happy. On my last ride someone commented on how much  I have improved, my speeds are the best they have ever been.  I want to be able to share with people that recovery is possible that you can go from the lowest, deepest dark hole, to that of a functional person who has a whole life ahead of them. After about 5 hospital admissions I am happy to say that I have made it through. I know I still have some way to go, gaining weight is almost the easy part its dealing with my head that takes the work. However I didn't get ill overnight so it isn't going to disappear overnight so I just have to be patient.

After all that.... This weekend has been pretty awesome too. I spent it at Andys we made pizzas on Saturday night from scratch-yep that included the dough!!!

 Pizza ingredients-yep that is mango:p 

Andy was such a good dough kneader!!

We even made cheesy dough sticks. 

My toppings included goats cheese, peppers, mushrooms, mango and emmental cheese. Oh and a bbq sauce base so so nice. 

We are making them again next Sunday for the rest of the family and letting them pre order them:p think I we may do some garlic bread too.  I have never made my own pizza dough before but they were so so nice, and the only ingredients in the dough was whole-wheat and white flour, pinch of salt, two tablespoons of olive oil, and water. It was so much fun too, can have whatever toppings you fancy. 

Have you ever made pizza? 

for those that have gained weight how did you feel when you got their? Also how long did it take to get your periods back? 

WIAW-valentines edition

Thanks to jenn for hosting

Well I am feeling very very happy this evening, as I've just come back from an amazing two night break in the romantic city of Bath with my amazing boyfriend, and also this evening I was able to run on the treadmill!!! Those glorious 15 minutes made me feel so so good. I hope this is the last of my knee pain, I will be taking it slowly though and build up my mileage.

This will be short and sweet, but I am super proud of me eating a three course meal. I am doing things I never thought possible, and feeling more determined than ever to beat this dreaded illness.

Breakfast:

Too start a glass of champagne!! 

Strawberries and greek yogurt

 smoked salmon, rye bread, poached eggs and watercress and spinach

This breakfast was amazing, well its only valentines day once a year. 

Rocket with tomatoes, mozerrela cheese and avocado

Dinner was amazing, we dined in this divine restaurant on the royal crescent. 

Buffalo mozzerella, pine nuts, and figs. I left the dressing as am not a fan of oil based ones.

The main I forget to photograph it was amazing though baked sea bass, with my favourite veg roasted butternut squash and brocolli and red skinned potatoes. 

Campapri and grapefruit sorbet

Washed down later on with plenty of cocktails and wine!!! Man did I have a hangover this morning. 

Happy Valentines day!!! 

Did you eat anything special on valentines day? 

Cocktail Time

Good day peeps. Hope everyone is having a nice Sunday. I have had a nice few days despite being at work which I really detest. But feeling myself get so much stronger running, and yesterday I went on a cycle ride it was meant to be a fairly easy cycle but being on the bike gave me so much freedom and ended up cycling up some hills. But it made me realise how much more work I need to do with food and I think the months that anorexia got really strong and I ended up in hospital I wasted some muscle damage so this is all the more reason to continue to fight no matter how strong the voice gets. (side note I was in hospital for really bad depression not for anorexia but I was barely eating at the time)   I want so much more than this horrid illness, I sometimes shudder when I think back to all the years I had lost to this illness and never want to go back to those dark days again.

Last night was a nice evening I cooked dinner for me and my boyfriend. I bought a load of squashes from the organic market in Totnes only place I have found different squashes. My local town stocks butternut squash and thats it. So I roasted some of this:

Which I believe is Kabocha squash I just love how orange they are inside:

I also cooked a sweet pototao.  I had this paired with a tuna steak and some broccoli and chantey carrots.

Me and my boyfriend had a fun evening planned making cocktails:

We made  Mojitos which were pretty easy to make. You just need

Rum

Fresh Mint leaves

Sugar

Lime and Soda Water

First step was to mash the mint leaves with one teaspoon of sugar

Then add 50ml rum 25 ml of lime juice and as much soda as you like and then the crushed ice on the top and alas two cocktails!!

Ever made cocktails? 

WIAW- Getting the new year off to a good start.

Well its been a long time till I have participated in this, mainly because no-one wants to read about plates of vegetables and fruit being consumed which is what my diet had consisted off, and it feels good to be able to eat proper food and fuel myself properly. 

This morning I started the day of properly with some oats, with natural yogurt and dried apricots. It has been months since I have ate porridge and it felt so warming and comforting. I need to work on the amounts I put in adding some healthy fats but is a step in the right direction.

After they had digested I went on an easy cycle ride did about 20 miles at a slow pace. I needed my legs to recover as I went on a long run the afternoon before did 9 miles, and this is my other bit of good news I have entered in an half marathon!!! When I was in a running shop I saw it on their counter and was attracted as it is traffic free and pancake flat!!!! Marathon details: http://www.ironbridgerunnerevents.co.uk/exeterhalf/ I actually have no idea how to train for a half marathon, will do some googling. I really love exercise so much and it has really helped me to get to a higher weight and eat more as I want to fuel my sport. I find I don't care so much about what I eat, my mood is a lot better and I learn to accept my body for what it is.


Lunch was spent with my lovely boyfriend. He cooked us something in his slowcooker, called gingered chickpeas with parsnips, carrots, and onions in a tomato sauce it was so nice. I had it with some roasted butternut squash:

Afterwards I had one of my cookies, these I have made before. But this time added honey and some  nakd pineapple raisins. It was adapted from this lovely girlies blog I actually made this in about 20 minutes when I came in from the bike ride as was waiting for Andy to pick me up.

After lunch and chilling out with Andy he took me food shopping, stocked up on essentials and then I went to my old house to pick up some things that have been their for months. We also stopped for a costa quite handy having a boyfriend who works in my favourite coffee place. So had a extra hot soya latte. 

This evening I cooked my favourite veg, roasted butternut squash with sage, cottage cheese and a chickpea salad!!

Favourite veg to eat in the winter? 
Any tips for a half marathon?